We're Approved!!! So why am I so nervous??

The final step in our approval process was this afternoon.  The director and her intern just drove away.  Seems like we "passed".

"When can you take kids?  I almost brought two with me today."  M.queried jokingly, yet seriously.

The need is so great, and we desire to help, and we know the Lord is with us, and is leading us.....yet....now I'm nervous.  Before it was all about filling out paperwork.  Going through training.  Passing the home assessment.  Each step along the way I asked God to stop the process if it was not what HE wanted for our family.  So now we are approved, and in waiting mode.

It all started with the first week at Camp Good News.  This particular week they had almost all homeless kids.  Two of the volunteer workers were not "regulars" and as I sat and talked with them I was informed of the inner city crisis in a new way.  A tornado had swept through North MPLS in May.  Some of the landlords decided to abandon the houses instead of fixing them.  Many families became homeless or continued to live in the condemned homes.  They didn't have anywhere to go.

The conversation with these ladies and the difficulties they were facing, seemed so foreign to me.   We have a support system of family and friends that would be here in a heartbeat to help us in our time of need.  Many people don't have that luxury.

Jump ahead a few weeks later.  I stumbled upon a need on our church community website.  It described an organization designed to help people in crisis with their kids. I hopped over to the website and watched the videos.  I called Jason and described the program as I saw it online.  He didn't hesitate and called the number I gave him.

At first M. said "NO."  We are too far away.  How would they get the kids to us?  Jason told her that wouldn't be a problem because he's all over the map....his office is in the cities, he's always on the go....to him the cities are not that far.  When she heard that, she was more on board with us.  We were signed up online for the training.

I took forever to do the training.  Mainly I wanted to NOT do it, but knew I had to.  It's so hard to get stuff like that done.  BUT...I'm thankful I did.  I learned sooo much!!!

We then went to see the founder, Dave Anderson, speak the following week.  So much of what he talked about had me nodding my head in agreement.  Safe Families is a ministry of hospitality.  A word lost in our culture to the Martha Stewart's and Better Homes and Gardens of this country.  I've always known that hospitality as it's used in the Bible actually means "love of strangers".  I never understood how that definition jived with what we Christians like to call "hospitality". (Oh...I have so much to SPEW FORTH about this....but I will hold off and maybe write separate blogposts!!!)

So....anyway....here we are today.  It's no longer a what if?  It's no longer...Are we going to pass?  We are now a SAFE FAMILY!!!  We are hoping to be a home where we can minister to parents in crisis....who need someone to help with their children, but have nowhere to turn.  Please pray with us and for us!!   We know the road will be difficult but we also know that we are called to serve.....God is with us!  Amen!!

I will now write down my fears and put them in my Faith box!!  God is FAITHful!!  He is always with us, and we don't have to fear....O.K....I will...but I'll give it to God...AGAIN!!:)

Signs of a LARG(ER) Family......

I make signs hoping they will help to alleviate confusion....to bring order....because living in a larg(er) family means that every person has his or her own idea of where things should go, when things should happen, etc, etc.  So here are some of my signs....lets see if they've helped any:

Last year I had one huge tub to collect all these.  Not fun to separate later....so this year...SEPARATION and SIGNS!!  My hope was that they would actually read and follow them.  I must say they aren't doing too bad.  But already you can see the screen(for caterpillars no less!!) in the glass basket!  I've also discovered the broom, dustpan, and vacuum in the baskets. 

AHHH.....our weekly dinner menu!!!  I put this up in hopes that it would alleviate the barrage of questions I get asked about our weekly schedule.  It has helped some.  When they were little I would pull my hair out with them asking the same question 5 times!!  Alas, it's not foolproof.  No sooner had I put this up my first question from an inquisitive 10 year old.  "Are we having Tator Tots or Chips with our Hamburgers?"  And from our 8 yr old "So, can we have pop for dinner?"

I had this sign made to let people know that we are changing the rules around a bit.  I used to have one person doing the kitchen area, but now I'm having them each bus their own dishes!!  Did it work.....NOT REALLY!!!  Old habits are hard to break.  They blame it on the baby sleeping....but I told them if he was sleeping they still needed to RINSE their dishes and get them ready for the dishwasher.  We are still in training!!(P.S....it took me a day to realize the misspelling...oh well...he's a hard worker!!)

AHHH....the story behind this one....we were away for a few days at camp when I came home to discover I had left out a bad plum.  Plus I think there were some bananas out (they always breed fruit flies!!)  Anyway....I got on the internet to figure out how to kill the annoying things, and made up a trap that involves apple cider vinegar!! It was working like a charm until someone came along and dumped my trap!!!  I was bummed....o.k...actually a little frustrated.  So I made another trap and added this "sign".  It hasn't been thrown out yet.....but the culprit hasn't been home since I made another one!;)

These signs are to show the kids how this cupboard is arranged so they don't just throw stuff in there and hope it all fits.  It's so annoying to try to find things in such disorganization.  I figured if I put up the signs they would have absolutely NO EXCUSE!!!  Did it work???  You be the judge!!

Is this like the photos???

I put my most successful sign up last!!!  It works every time I remember to put it up!!!:)

Well.....What do you think.....signs good?  Not worth the paper their printed on??  How do you organize a larg(er) family?

Perfect Perceptions.....

A few days ago Jess happened upon this necklace over in ETSY.  I thought the phrase was fitting for the trials that have been sovereignly placed in our lives.  These trials have to do with perceptions of our family.  Perfect perceptions.....we put off an air of perfection....we try to be perfect....."acting" perfect. UGH!! 

So what have I learned from these perceptions of us......

• We need to work on pride.  Perfection=Pride.  Plain and simple. 
• People's perceptions are a result of their own lives....where they've been, where they are now, their outlook on the future.....not necessarily based on reality.
• I am not responsible for other people's perceptions....they may be accurate or false...I need to seek the Lord to sift through my heart....and be humble, willing to learn and change if needed.
• GOD will one day bring me to perfection....AMEN!! (Phil 1:6)

I am saddened, yet thankful that this was brought to our attention.  I've walked the path of role-playing in the churches we've attended.  I've seen that destruction and resolved NEVER to walk that path again.  I am a person that wants REAL.  Always have been....I can't stand FAKE(see last post!).   For the past 4-5 years I've tried really, really hard to make sure people know we aren't perfect.  I am who I am....take me or leave me.  Seems that many will leave....I can't control that.

The perfect perception is hard one to combat.  I don't know how many times I've had someone say to us:

"I thought you believed such n such".  Homeschooling for example.  Because we have followed the Lord's call to homeschool people assume we believe that everyone should follow this path.  We've had people "argue" their public school stance, and are surprised when we wholeheartedly agree with their choice.  Homeschooling isn't biblical anymore than washing your sink with Comet verses Soft Soap.  It's a preference....a choice....a decision everyone makes for themselves.

So I completely understand that sometimes our choices make other people uncomfortable with us.  That I can't change.  But I do ask that they don't assume they know what we believe.  They might be really surprised at the responses we give.

I know within our family we've tried to model forgiveness.  We show our "true colors" daily to our children.  We've had to ask them many times to forgive us....that we were wrong.  Something I didn't hear much growing up.    I appreciate this article..."Living by Conviction without being a Hypocrite" over at THATMOM.com....which ends with:

"Our children and anyone else we minister to do not expect us to be perfect. In fact, if we pretend that we have it all together, they will know we are lying! But they do rightly expect to see progress, which means living lives of integrity that start with admitting when we fail and then doing something about it."

A great friend to our family gave me this plaque the first year I met her.  I absolutely love it!!!  I look at it all the time and nod my head in agreement to it.  Especially "We do LOUD really well"....but also we do "REAL"....we do MISTAKES....we do HUGS.....wait...as I read it again....I am agreeing with it all.  That's what I think our family is!!   This is what I hope it to be.  Actually my hearts desire is to have our family be a fragrant aroma of Jesus!!!

And this is the funny thing about perceptions.  On the heels of the perfection perceptions I get a phone call yesterday and out of the blue this person started praising our family.  How she'd wish we lived closer so her kids could play with ours.  It seemed like she went on forever.  I was in tears, however.  I shared with her  the perfect perceptions and that we aren't perfect.  She knows that, but she said (and this is what really got me crying)....."You guys are living for Christ.  That's bound to convict some people.  It may depend on where they are at with their walk with the Lord.  You should never have to apologize for that."  We talked a little about pride and perfection. So I'm thankful for that phone call....all 12 minutes of it!!  Thankful for the situation that precipitated it....(even though it was another trial....see... our family isn't perfect!)


So....I want to wrap this post up by saying bold and loudly.....


OUR FAMILY ISN'T PERFECT....NOR ARE WE TRYING TO BE....WE ARE EXCRUCIATINGLY AWARE OF OUR FAILINGS....


I also want to say.....although we know we aren't perfect and really aren't trying to act perfect.....we won't air ALL our dirty laundry.....NOBODY does!!!  See my post about FB!!!  No one is going to share the deep secrets of their family, children, wives, husbands, themselves.....unless God calls them to minister to others in that area.


Finally I'll end by asking for grace as we work on our pride and arrogance.  Please forgive us!  We really aren't trying to be or act perfect.  We try to walk with the Lord...obeying Him....but we are sinners. 

O.K.....NOW....I'll REALLY end with....... how I began....

Any good you do see in us is because of JESUS!!!

(NOW...hop on over to the ETSY shop and get your necklace...it's for a good cause....they are trying to earn money to adopt!!)

Facebook Fast

It's official...I'm not on Facebook anymore (for now!!).   I've wanted to wean from the addictedness that is called Facebook for quite some time.  I'm not sure what even draws me there in the first place...but isn't that how it is with addictions(idols)?  We are hooked and we don't even know how we got there.

I remember that fateful day sitting at our dining room table while my father-in-love showed me this cool site they were on.  I'm always the cynic....skeptical one.  I even said...."Looks like a waste of time to me.  Who has time for this stuff?"....  Much to the chagrin of my FIL I'm sure!!

Yet here I am a few years later weaning myself from it.  This is my second attempt in the past year.  The first attempt was thrust upon me like a baby with a dirty diaper.

I was trying to show how one of my darling children was addicted to that other addiction we women tend to crave.....CHOCOLATE.  I challenged her to give it up for awhile, to which she charged back....

"If YOU give up Facebook!" 

OUCH!!  WOW!!  Snarky teenager!!

"Fine!! Challenge on!!  Let's see who gives in first."

I'm the ultimate competitor.....I'm gonna WIN!!!

So I set out.....NO FACEBOOK here I come!!  I made a list of all the activities I could do instead of waste my time on FB....(you know really.....I wasn't on ALL THAT much....you know how kids exaggerate!?!)  The list was long....really long.  I even put it up on my bedroom wall...right by the light switch so I would see it every morning as I got ready for my day.

I would show you the list....but it's gone...not even on my computer!!  That about sums up how well that worked!

But seriously....I don't know exactly what drew me back.  Maybe Extreme Couponing??  Sooo many companies were offering great deals for "liking" them on FB!!  I couldn't miss out on that!  Or was it that most of my "friends" contact me through FB?  I don't know.....

I do know I got back on.  I don't know who won the bet!

So jump to last week.  Another challenge to a teen....another counter challenge to me.  Actually this one was different.  I offered my fast.  I desired it.  Facebook is really not good for me.....not good for my health!!

HEALTH???  HUH???

Yes, my health!!  Because my brain was beginning to think in STATUS UPDATES.  Short 180 character updates.  I would go through my day not thinking in long, drawn out, fully descriptive paragraphs....like I used to.  My journal was non-existant.  And even now as I've started to write again....I can only write in "bullet points".....not paragraphs.

The other problem is that Facebook is fake.  Who is going to post that they threatened death upon their kids?  Kicked out their husbands?  Have anorexia?  Are a closet smoker/alcoholic/lesbian/pornography viewer/(put your own vise in here)?  Who puts on there that they are in a deep severe depression?  That their kids are felons?  Their teen daughters pregnant?    I don't know....I could make the list a mile long!

When I first heard that psychologists are now diagnosing teenage Facebook depression, I kinda scoffed.  But now I don't.  It makes perfect sense.  When we log on to facebook we see such "perfect" lives.  We only see the good, fun parties everyone(but you) is attending!  But of course we see these things.....who wants to throw out their dirty laundry to a bunch of  "friends"??

So I'm off.  Really off!!  (O.K....I only "deactivated" it....the next leap will be "delete"....but I'm not there yet.)  It's only been a week and I have high hopes this time.  I am hoping to regain the way I used to relate to people....personal notes, a quick "hey, howya doin'?" phone call, an invite for dinner, swinging by to say "hi"......and even blogging!!!

So here is a salute to the DARK AGES......before FB....quill pen here I come!!! 

I needed this quote today....

"To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable."
— C.S. Lewis (The Four Loves)

I'll do anything for a giveaway......

So....yep.....here is a link to a giveaway......try it.....you might win!! Oooo....is the suspense killing ya.......you know you want to click on the link....just click...seriously it's not some whacked site that's going to hack into your computer.....it's legit.....so......try it......

Mystery Giveaway Link

See it wasn't that bad! Now spread the news....and you might win too!:-)